I'm Going to Kill the Guitarist

I live next to a bar. Never had problems before, none. Sometimes on Saturday's you can slightly hear the base, but eh, it's Saturday. Last night some asshole plugged in an electric guitar and started practicing blues around midnight. I don't know where he was, but he might as well been playing in my bedroom. Notice I said practicing, not playing. It's a fine distinction, as playing might have led to rhythm, melodies, enjoyable songs. You know, tolerable. This guy banged his way through nasty guitar twangs, chords, and then he topped it off by tuning his guitar over the course of about 15 minutes.

This guy doesn't know it, but he's going to get promoted to nemesis if he keeps it up. That slot is currently held by the woman who had her dog jump in front of my car to shit in my turn lane. Two Fridays in a row. Such a weird city.

(posted by grant at 5/31/2007)   (0) comments

Elves With Guns...or Race Cars?

Don't get me wrong -- I love katana wielding Spock look-alikes with modern weaponry. Hell, just give me Spock and we can call it a day. But things are looking grim for Shadowrun, and let's face it -- there's no Mr. Spock anywhere in sight. Well, not in the game.


The badness: It shipped yesterday and there are no reviews anywhere. Metacritic is blank. Typically, if the publisher doesn't send gaming publications a review copy it means something is wrong.

Random forums I've checked have little positive to say about it, if anything. The hate seems to focus on the price tag ($60 for a multiplayer only console game, despite reduced priced games like Warhawk inbound for the PS3) and worry about future support for the game (big rumors FASA is about to get waxed).

I think I'm going to buy Forza 2. Huge reviews, major in-game features to assist new players (something Madden could benefit from), and the online features sound awesome: 8 player racing at 60 fps, sponsored tournaments, eBay like car trading/selling. I don't think I can pass that up.

I'm going to give the demo another try.

(posted by grant at 5/30/2007)   (0) comments

Achievement Obsession

Damn Microsoft and their cursed achievements. I borrowed Open Season and Eragon from the company Friday afternoon to endure this weekend...only for the achievements. My friend has just shy under 13000 and I need to catch up.

Open Season was surprisingly, uh, "charming" gameplay wise and I finished it for a clean 1000 Achievements. A few levels required a few playthroughs to earn all of the wild points, but the worst part was the weak gameplay and lame jokes. The stand-in Ashton Kutcher was weak. So glad I never paid to see the movie.

Eragon is another story entirely. I had some friends over and I forced them to play co-op with me, but after 6 levels we just couldn't take it anymore. The game was just too horrendous. I think it's safe to call it one of the worst games I've ever played. Critics agree!

I also grabbed Splinter Cell: Double Agent, but I couldn't survive 5 minutes in the first level. No on-screen prompts, no tutorial, and most frustrating was the error in the manual. Some moron printed two versions of the underwater controls, so there was no place for me to look up how to do anything. The series has always kicked my ass, so I guess it's just a good reason to go back to Rainbow Six. I prefer machine guns to all that sneaking around.

(posted by grant at 5/28/2007)   (0) comments

Astroturf Picnic

Updated: Now with pictures!

We wanted to have a picnic Sunday, I suppose to take advantage of the three day weekend. San Francisco was (as usual) too cold, so we headed south to San Mateo to a park along the bay. Park turned into a jogging path surrounded by tall grasses and hills not suitable for picnicing. Thankfully, a quick search resulted in the discovery of a patch of...astroturf. I have no idea why it's there, but it was actually quite soft.

The view was a bit boring -- a bay without waves or boats to watch is somewhat slow. Counting landing airplanes was only fascinating for about 16 airplanes. However, never underestimate the ability to entertain yourself with a digital camera. So many stupid pictures can be taken.



(posted by grant at 5/28/2007)   (0) comments

More EndWar!

Just found out that Ubi is planning a public beta for EndWar this November. Totally cool. More developers should really take advantage of the thousands of free beta testers lurking on Live. Bungie is doing it with Halo 3 and I guarantee bugs and balance issues they never encountered on their own are popping up. If you have a game that is stable and good enough to beta test, it just makes good sense from a development and marketing standpoint to let the public have at it for free early on.

Things like this and demos are two of the coolest new "features" of this console generation -- something the original Xbox simply couldn't pull off. It really brings consoles one step closer to PCs, and there's a small side of me that wants consoles to just stomp on PC gamers. I hate how those guys whine about everything. "PC gamers are getting the shaft", "the consoles get all the good games", "My thighs are faaaaat".

It's like whining about your hot girlfriend just because she didn't make you a sandwich.

(posted by grant at 5/25/2007)   (0) comments

Net Consumption

Some net goodness! Enjoy these nutrients as you waste your morning.

Updated!
I just got this Assassin's Creed video linked. UbiSoft is really onto something here. It's like the more awesome version of Prince of Persia. Goddamn this trailer rocks. The Ctrl+Alt+Del guy's comments are spot on.

There was a lot of information on Ubisoft's EndWar released yesterday. It's a new RTS game built from the ground up for the console. Two things really stood out: It's using voice command controls and they are switching from a traditional top down view to an "over the shoulder" view. They compared it to Madden, which sounds cool to me. Give the linebackers guns is what I always say.

Watch the Video on Kotaku, then read the interview on Shacknews.

Scott Kurtz posted a really funny Panda Attack comic on PvP Online. It makes perfect sense if you know the strip, plus this one's in color for once. I dig the visual style, and the idea of pandas in someone's bloodstream.

There's a fairly interesting Interview with EA's Bing Gordon on Gamasutra. He's a fairly interesting character and there are some details about Renderware, new IP, Spore, etc.

Lastly, I discovered iGoogle the other day. It's pretty awesome. I'd say more edamame awesome than cheeseburger awesome.

(posted by grant at 5/24/2007)   (0) comments

I'll Take You Four


Numero Uno
Taking the top spot because of its imminent release is Shadowrun for the 360. FASA Studio created Crimson Skies on the original Xbox, so an impending multiplayer title from them gets me all tingly.

  • Bueno: Designed purely for a unique form of multiplayer in which you pick your race, magical abilities, and technology at the start of every round. The flexibility and variety makes it seem like the game could have quite a long shelf life, especially for those wanting to master everything.
  • No Bueno: Designed purely for multiplayer. No single player...on a console? The $60 price point seems a bit steep and I worry about the adoption rate for the title. Especially with Halo 3 looming on the horizon. No community means this Shadow will run. Oh get it.

Numero Due
Bilingual! XBL Arcade has only released a few great original titles so far (Catan and the delightfully free Aegis Wing) but the potential for the platform is huge. I think Wing Commander Arena could rock it pretty hard. If only it had Mark Hamil to top it off -- so dreamy.

  • Buon: Wing Commander returns, and if this does well perhaps there will be an honest to god flight Sim title in the future? Pure, simple competitive multiplayer sounds really good. I just hope it's 800 points and nothing more. Boom Boom Rocket was already overpriced at 800, so much that I refuse to link it.
  • Difettoso: I always hate it when reviewers slam Arcade games. They're $10 bucks...what could go wrong? This seems to be the dev team's first title, but what's been released so far looks good.

Nummer Drei
Giving the public access to Halo 3 before its release is just another good move from Halo's marketing team. It demonstrates to the public at large two things: More Halo is a good thing and corpse humping never gets old.

  • Gut:The revised mix of weapons feels a lot more like Halo: CE, but duel wielding is still there for those who want to do it. Basically, a weapon for every play style. I haven't had a chance to tool with equipment yet, but it sounds like a good idea and more objective based gameplay is always a good thing.
  • Schlecht:The game's release will cause a retail fanfare, literally a 5 ton gorilla potato sacking every other release in sight. I like that I can play R6: Vegas, Crackdown, Catan, or Gears easily online. I don't want Halo 3 drawing the masses away from every other game.

The Ocho Divided by Two
I'm going out on a limb here...Hei$t. Two things should immediately stand out: the horrendous title involving a symbol other than an A, B, C, etc. but also the fact that it implies something other than the GTA style of crime.

  • El Goodo:A cool setting involving afros and hopefully jive turkeys. Plan and execute bank robberies with your crew, so a little strategy and puzzle solving to go with the action. And it's an original idea.


(posted by grant at 5/22/2007)   (0) comments

I'll Show You Mine

I finally got into XBL after over a year of veto. I just didn't want to be called a douche faggot by some 12 year old w/ a headset. I'm sensitive. Boom:





I'm almost ashamed to whip out my achievements.

(posted by grant at 5/21/2007)   (0) comments

Are ewe ready for woolly violence?

Vitamin Water is fruity goodness, much like Tobias Funke, world-renowned Analrapist.

Tracy McGrady of the Houston Rockets jumps in to this quick 30 second spot and heaves a sheep across a field. Wait, first he steals the sheep from a scotsman and then heaves it.

I really hope PETA saw this. The way the sheep thuds on the ground is just brilliant.

(posted by grant at 5/21/2007)   (0) comments

Third Time?

I'm going to try this blog thing...again. Like a World of Warcraft subscription, it's not something I can fully quit. I did pay for the site and everything. Might as well use it.

(posted by grant at 5/21/2007)   (0) comments